An acquaintance of mine is back on the streets, homeless once more. Now Kerry (I am taking his word that he does not mind me using his name as opposed to Mr. X) is bright, articulate and hard-working. Once he arrived in Abbotsford last spring he hustle jobs to get the cash together to meet the amount required to get off the street and into habitation. As I have observed, personally experienced and written about, getting the money needed to take that HUGE step from being homeless to having a home is daunting. Social assistance tends to be more a series of obstacles rather than of assistance and the shelter rate is so low and totally unrealistic that in its way it acts as a barrier as well. The city government has been a barrier to any organization wanting to help with the need for housing aimed to transition people off the street, into reduced rental housing, the workforce and on into the regular housing market. Thus it is that I find myself (as noted in the previous posting) starting work but facing another two months or so of homelessness in order to accumulate the stake needed to pay the full market rental costs in Abbotsford. Two tough months of struggling to get to work, managing to bath. to do laundry, be presentable and to somehow find enough food to eat.

It is fine for politicians and others, living in some world where they see only what they want to see, to talk so easily of “they just need to get off their lazy asses and find a job”. Reality is an entirely different matter. I have no idea of how many people this inability or refusal to understand a basic economic fact/truth has denied employment and housing to by failing to provide the badly needed aid to make the transition.

It was somewhat chilling to see Kerry back on the street while I am preparing for the scramble to (at some point) transition off the street. He was injured, could not work for several weeks (a broken ankle had him hobbling around with his foot encased) and having no savings (since it is hard enough to get enough $$$ together to get a place, you cannot manage a savings “cushion” as well) – BAM – out on the street. Social Assistance is not designed (but should be) to quickly step in and provide aid so you do not become homeless, bridging the gap until you can return to work. In fact the workers deny you the 185.00 (as well as the 325.00 which you would reasonable expect not to receive) claiming that homelessness prevents you from finding work. But the system will not do anything to prevent this homeless ness from occurring. Oh yes, it also ignores evidence it does not want to see – such as the fact that I managed to find employment while homeless (thanks in part to the current system) and dealing with, or at least trying to deal with, the idiocy of the current system. it just required a lot more determination and effort to overcome the millstone of the system’s “assistance”.

With all else that is on my plate in the struggle to get back on my feet, I really did not need to be reminded of the obstacles faced in that undertaking and how fragile ones grip on home, work and even a very basic, simple lifestyle can be.

I took a seat beside him because he was reading a copy of the article on this blog from somethingcool.ca. I had printed off several copies and left them for other homeless to find and read so that I could get some feedback.

Once seated I found he had had to much to drink. He was a little on the scruffy side so most would have avoided him in the first place, throw in being drunk and the ‘avoiders’ would have been giving him a wide berth. At an earlier point I would have been one of those going out of their way in avoidance. I would then have missed out on the thoughts raised in listening and talking to him.

Aside: One of the somewhat surprising things I have learned from this arduous life lesson concerns listening. I have learned much of interest to me from a wide variety of individuals. A favorite group from a person who is mentally challenged; things I needed to help me deal with life on the street from my fellow homeless; an insight from a scruffy drunk. So – practice your listening skills, you could learn a lot of interest and use this way. Not necessarily from the homeless but from your family, friends and those around you.

He was quite upset with the statement that the system, the government and the public lump us all together and view us as one type. It developed that he was not disputing the claim that we are all viewed as one thing, rather he was upset with all those who lumped so many different individuals, stories and situations into one big pile and stick ONE label on all. He did not deny his alcohol problem, freely admitting to it. However, he stressed that he worked for the money he spent on alcohol. He did not collect welfare, did not rob or steal and while it may not be considered a traditional job he EARNED his own money – and paid taxes too (if only sales and excise taxes). He is one of those ‘lazy bums’ who are far from lazy, working hard for his money. It upset him greatly to be lumped together under one label. Worth noting is the fact that he had the courtesy to ask if he was disturbing me (I had the Daily News on my lap. And only continued the conversation when I had assured him he was not disturbing me.

As I reviewed this conversation in my mind and thought not just about the words themselves but what he was in fact ‘saying’ I realized that we were talking about dignity. I was about to use the word simple with reference to human dignity but I realized there is nothing simple about human dignity. Dignity is a part of human nature, something we all have/need and one of the first things taken from the homeless. The system, government and public view and treat the poor, those in need and the homeless as worthless excess baggage – a burden to society. Beat these people down with labels, attitudes, actions, the police and treat them as throw away people. Many look down their noses. I have heard people I know speak with contempt about the homeless (se Footnote 1 below). I know from the backgrounds of some of these folk that it was only through the best of luck, the workings of blind chance, that they have home, family and a comfortable life rather than being homeless and on the streets themselves. Perhaps it is some inner knowledge of just how close they came, how truly lucky they are, that makes them so vehement in the condemnation of the homeless and those in need. In the same vein of ex-smokers being so vehement about anti smoking laws or quitting smoking.

Worthless. Burden. Human garbage. Drunks. Druggies. Ignorant. Lazy. Uneducated. Bums. Freeloaders. Chipping away until their dignity is gone. Yet they turn around and ask “Have you no pride?” – no, the system, government and public have beaten down so many of the disadvantaged, the homeless. Until they reach the point where there is no sense even trying for them. Then beats upon them for having this outlook of despair.

There are any number of inspirational speakers and sayings stressing how important attitudes are in any endeavour. That self image and belief are needed for success. How we look at ourselves and the world affects strongly our motivation. The inner conversations we have, what thoughts our minds are fed, our dreams – all affect our actions. You can live your dreams OR live your fears and self doubts.

I wonder just what the effect of building up their self-esteem/image, of granting them human dignity, of treating them (others) as you would want to be treated yourself would be? That would require ideologues in government and the public to open their minds about the reality of the poor and the homeless, actually see what is and change their Behaviours. SNORT. Yea, right. Open those closed minds? Hmmmm. With more members of local church congregations aware of and wanting to help….. perhaps a miracle such as open minds can be hoped (prayed) for.

I have been accused of having to much pride in that I have not asked for all the help as often as I could – or more importantly as often as I should have. Pride? Or just the need ton preserve my dignity? I do not know. I will acknowledge that as my self-esteem has healed my ability to share the fact of my being homeless with others has grown. It is also true that after the latest ‘put down the homeless’ rant I heard I had to send the web address to this site to the household, not as Mr. H but as moi. I have not yet heard back but it was something I felt I had to do and was comfortable with whatever comes of that action. Of course this does emphasize that people have an image I in their heads of the homeless, an often highly inaccurate image, and do not see me (a homeless person) as fitting their image. Having judged me as a fellow worthwhile citizen they feel free to denigrate the homeless to me – how very ironic. A person at the table I was eating lunch at the Salvation Army at was likewise running down the homeless (or perhaps just trying to build herself up by putting others down0. When someone at the table informed her I was homeless she refused to believe it. After all I was to clean and presentable – not at all like the public perception of the homeless. She may well still not believe I was homeless but she did act differently after being informed I was homeless. lol She claimed she only came to the Salvation Army for company over lunch (from those she deems acceptable) and so she would not have any dishes to clean up. If these are the true reasons she was eating food prepared for those in need I can only suggest she take a long, hard, soul searching look in the mirror before decides to disparage the homeless. A case of the pot calling the kettle “sooty bottom”.

I will stop here and leave you with this thought – what does it truly say about the public at larges views and the true nature of the homeless that these self-appointed experts, who felt free to hold forth on how terrible and worthless homeless people are, cannot even recognize a homeless person sitting in front (or beside) them?