I was at a MCC Supportive Care workshop where the keynote speaker was Dr. Strauss. I was looking forward to the day and was feeling upbeat. Dr. Strauss was quite interesting to listen to until he spoke about recovery vis-à-vis depression. He noted that depression could be treated quite successfully and cited some statistics about the low reoccurrence of subsequent episodes of depression. Oh, oh, this did not seem to fit my pattern – what was wrong with me??? Then he said that that was for those who had early diagnosis and treatment, but in cases where the depression was suffered for a longer time reoccurring episodes increased in likelihood and frequency. Whew, that explains and fits my experience, ahhh.

Wait a minute!!! Me = close to three decades of depression et al. Little extrapolation and AAAARIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! Whiiiiiiiiiimmmmmmper.
Ohhh noooooo. I should be so depressed. Siggghhhh.

??? Why am I chuckling at these thoughts and not hopping onto that little gerbil wheel in my mind? Because I have much better mental habits, I pay attention these days to my inner dialogue and feelings, it does offer insight into what is and likely will be my experiences as I continue in recovery and there is nothing I can do about it. Which explains why the al-anon topic this evening was acceptance.

There is recovery. For some of us it is just a longer, more problematical and more convoluted journey. The real point is that screening and early detection are important in making recovery a more straightforward proposition. If you or someone you care for shows signs of needing help, find out and start to get on with living well. The real lose here is not that the passage of time has made recovery a more “interesting” journey, but that I have missed an extra decade or two of joy, passion, intimacy and laughter.